The Time of the Month

I'm a hypochondriac. I self-diagnose myself with all kinds of diseases. From brain tumors and femoral torsion to dyslexia and narcolepsy... I also am pretty sure I have a heart disease because my limbs are too long and a doctor told me that once. I think I'm bi-polar and could have some kind neurodegenerative disease that causes amnesia. That's just the short list. Basically any new disease I hear about is the reason I am the way I am. I've had to tone my doctor's visits down a bit since I've been married and had to pay my own co-pay but I still make an occasional visit to make sure I don't have cancer.

This month I've been having the most intense cravings. It's just one of my monthly signs that tells me I'm pregnant. I'm not just "hungry for something"... I would do anything to have a strawberry frostingless Poptart!... Or some California rolls--Then a few hours later an apple! Usually my hunger cravings aren't so bad, it's usually the sleepiness and the boob soreness that makes me think I'm pregnant. Yea, that's right...I have monthly pregnancy scares.

You'd think I'd learn my lesson but no... I don't know how many times I've bought a pregnancy test a day too early. What's up with that?