The OMG Moment of the Week

You've GOT to be KIDDING me...

Ok, I love the Seriously So Blessed Blog. If you haven't read it yet I suggest you do. It's a great satire of LDS culture. Well, TAM (the fictional name of the writer of the blog) is having a Moprah giveaway, and while I was looking through some of the items I came across one of the funniest/ridiculous-looking things I have seen in my life... No joke!! Check this out:

They're... I don't even know what to call it (a pretty sheet?). They're called "Designer labor and delivery gowns" and are $50 each. If you're feeling extra special you can even get a matching blanket to catch the baby in or as they call it a "receiving blanket."

I don't think it's the idea that makes me laugh as much as the models posing in them. I can just imagine a lady walking into the hospital wearing one of those and being like "Ok I'm ready!"

I don't know about you, but what I'm wearing when I deliver a baby will probably be the LAST thing on my mind. And doesn't the hospital give you one for free? Well, maybe those are ugly, I don't know, but $50? Common!

Sorry, but if I see anyone wearing one of these in their "first family picture" I'll admire their cute little baby, but then I'm going to laugh... a lot.

The Perfect Age to Have a Baby

Ok ok, obviously the time is different for everyone and from what I've hear you're never really "ready," but for the sake of my blog, humor me a little while I compare and contrast.

As of now I'm thinking I'll be in my 20s when I have my first child, but that has fluctuated over my four years of marriage. I have no intentions of being in my 40s but early 30s could be a possibility. Here are some interesting tidbits I learned from a very long article.

20s

-"Physically, the 20s are the ideal time for pregnancy," doctors say. Because your body is primed to handle the demands of carrying a baby.
-You're less likely to have pregnancy complications or babies with Down Syndrome.
-You can also grow up with your child (I'm personally not a fan of that idea, I can't imagine having a teenager before I'm 40... SCARY!!!
-Mentally: A lot of my (non-LDS) friends won't have kids yet, and I may have to put my career/advanced education on hold for awhile.
-Also, still relatively new in a marriage, we'd have to make sure we plan more time for each other.

Stories:

Carla (was 21)-The down side: Being a young mom means that it's hard not to be selfish about my time. I used to sleep in, read, or watch TV whenever I wanted and go out with friends any night I pleased. All these freedoms go away when you're a parent.

The good side: Bouncing back after pregnancies is easier when you're younger. I've gotten down to my starting weight after each one. Two weeks after I had Aliza I was in a bridesmaid dress.

I'm happy that my kids have young grandparents -- they're all in their 50s -- and seven great-grandparents. I'm always calling my mom and mother-in-law for advice

Samantha (was 25)- My career had been important to me -- I was just starting out and was very ambitious. But during my maternity leave, I realized that motherhood was what life was about for me right now.

My friends hadn't had kids yet. Some of my closest mom friends are women in their 30s and 40s whom I met in the neighborhood or at playgroups. They were eager to take me under their wing and share their wisdom.

There are times when Chris and I hear about all the wild things our single friends are doing and we're envious. But then something magical happens at home with our boys and we're reminded that we have such a full life to be thankful for.

30s

-At higher risk of developing certain complications. But the majority of healthy women still have uneventful pregnancies at this age. At age 35 there's 1/200 chance of having a child with Down Syndrome.
-More likely to have a C-section
-Mentally: I've had time for myself and my marriage, and I've accomplished some professional goals. This could give peace of mind if wanting to take a break to spend time with spawn.
-It'll be easier to find a support group of pregnant friends and get advice.

Stories:

Carol (was 30)- Good side: Financial stability -- we own our own apartment now, and we've got some money saved for Emily's education. It also meant that Emily doesn't have to compete with my career. I put so much time and energy into my job in my 20s that I felt like I was able to step back a little once I had her. I found a new position within the company that allows me to work at home sometimes, so I can spend more time with her.

Because we waited to have kids, our parents are all retired or about to retire, which means I get a lot of help! My parents-in-law watch Emily every day while I'm at work.

(apparently she had no down sides)

Erica (was 36)- I'm glad that I had time to be spontaneous, go out with friends, and travel before having kids -- it's a lot harder to get out of the house and do things when you have a baby. And I feel like I'm a better person for having had the experiences I did before having Lena. I just hope that she'll feel the same way and that she'll keep me young.

40s

-Having a baby in your 40s is common these days, and the majority of older mothers have totally normal pregnancies. Still, the risk of complications rises after age 40.
-This is crazy: If you're physically fit, eat well, and don't have preexisting health conditions such as diabetes or hypertension, your overall risk of other pregnancy complications isn't markedly higher than that of a woman in her 20s or 30s.
-The self-confidence and perspective you've picked up in your life may make you more patient in dealing with a demanding newborn.

Story:

Andrea (was 44)-Down sides: My friends' children are now in college, so I'm completely out of sync! They went through all the sleepless nights and playdates and pediatrician appointments years ago -- and I'm just starting. I honestly don't feel my age at all, but I realize that as I get older it's going to become more challenging.

I thought being older would mean that I'd be more prepared for motherhood. I was centered, had traveled extensively, had eaten in all the best restaurants, and had bought all the clothes I wanted. But honestly, the experience of the two of them brings me to my knees. I wouldn't have been more prepared at 144.

As of now I'm saying the perfect age is..... (Drumroll please)...... 30!! Not in 30s but 30. That'll give me another 7 years to get where I want to be in my career, hopefully have a Master's Degree, and I'll have been married for *gasp* 12 years!! -Do I think that'll happen? No, but as of today,that's my story and I'm sticking to it. (Ask me again tomorrow).

I'd love to hear your stories!! I'd love to see personal examples from people in 20s 30s and 40s! (Or opinions of why you'd prefer one over another).

-Also, if you'd like to read more about pregnancy in each age group here's a few more articles.

The Surrogate

20/20 is giving me a lot of blog material lately. I came across a story the other day about a woman who had 3 kids of her own and 8 kids for other people. She's a Serial Surrogate and says giving the baby she carried to the parents who couldn't carry it themselves is the best present she can give.

She became a surrogate mother when she was looking for a job she could do from home so she could spend time with her 3 young children. She says she loves being pregnant, and loves the attention she gets as a pregnant woman.

While you get $25K-$40K per pregnancy something tells me that's not worth it (that's in the U.S., interestingly enough in Britain the surrogate mother can't be paid for more than "reasonable expenses due to pregnancy"). I've never experienced pregnancy but from what I've seen and heard it's not too pretty. I'm not sure how "life threatening" it is but putting yourself at that kind of health risk for someone seems like it could be a really hard challenge. Would you or could you do it?

Supposedly the people she carries the baby for are couples who just can't carry their own child... as in the embryo is theirs. Do you think there's anything morally wrong with that? Personally, I don't. I mean, I think it would be hard to sacrifice that much for someone else but I don't think it's wrong.

I'm not gonna lie. It's crossed my mind before... The thought of hiring a surrogate (yea, I'm a hypocrite I know). I didn't think long an hard about it but at one point in time I thought "yea, hire someone else to do all the work. Sweet!" Now I don't think that's an option I'd consider unless I medically couldn't carry my own child. I definitely think I'd consider adoption first--But let's pray I am not limited to choose either.

Either way I thought it was a very interesting story. Myself being a journalist, I find people like this very intriguing and if I ever meet a being like this I'd trap them and ask them 20 questions.
Here's the report:

The Can of Worms--Boobs of Milk

Breastfeeding, I know it's a huge topic in the blogsphere right now, and just in everyday life for woman who have children.

I never thought much of it. I wasn't breastfed (I think my mom was afraid she'd smother me) and I never really thought one way or another that it was a big deal. But arguments saying it's healthier for your kids makes me think it's worth it. I think if I didn't have time or whatever I'd just invest in a good pump.

This isn't something I want to debate over, especially since I have a LOOOONG time to think about it, but I'd like your thoughts on it.

It seems lately there's a huge divide between women who do and those who don't. I think it's kind of sad. I wouldn't want people to make me feel bad for something I couldn't or didn't want to do. I mean, I turned out OK :op

Why do you think there is that divide between women? Why do women who breastfeed feed like they need to practically bash women who don't?

Ok another weird thing I've heard... Don't hate me but "Breast feeding parties?" And I don't mean everyone has their own kid their feeding..I'm talking about the ones where they pass their kids around and share! Not to offend people who do that but what's up with that? Couldn't another person have something your child is allergic to and give that to them? I honestly just don't get that! I have a friend who was trying to decide on a family to give her baby to for adoption and she was turned off by a family who wanted to do that to her child.

Ok ladies, enlighten me! I'm not saying I won't listen to your reasons why this is done... I honestly have know clue and want to know!

Also... Another extreme thanks to 20/20... Breastfeeding grown kids!! What do you think?

The Time of the Month

I'm a hypochondriac. I self-diagnose myself with all kinds of diseases. From brain tumors and femoral torsion to dyslexia and narcolepsy... I also am pretty sure I have a heart disease because my limbs are too long and a doctor told me that once. I think I'm bi-polar and could have some kind neurodegenerative disease that causes amnesia. That's just the short list. Basically any new disease I hear about is the reason I am the way I am. I've had to tone my doctor's visits down a bit since I've been married and had to pay my own co-pay but I still make an occasional visit to make sure I don't have cancer.

This month I've been having the most intense cravings. It's just one of my monthly signs that tells me I'm pregnant. I'm not just "hungry for something"... I would do anything to have a strawberry frostingless Poptart!... Or some California rolls--Then a few hours later an apple! Usually my hunger cravings aren't so bad, it's usually the sleepiness and the boob soreness that makes me think I'm pregnant. Yea, that's right...I have monthly pregnancy scares.

You'd think I'd learn my lesson but no... I don't know how many times I've bought a pregnancy test a day too early. What's up with that?

The Shocking News

I had a dream the other night about a friend of mine... A friend at work being pregnant. I told her a few days later about my dream, about how real it felt and how sure I was that she could have been pregnant. We talk about kids, babies a lot. Our baby itch, and urges. I was sure that's why I was having the dream. For kicks and giggles we looked up the meaning for dreaming about friends being pregnant and couldn't find any. A few days later I think I found the meaning...

Another friend of mine...One of my closest, best friends told me she's pregnant. My dream was the same day she found out. She also swore me to secrecy. She's only told another mutual friend and her husband the news, and she's terrified. I couldn't believe it, but the first emotion that surged through my body was jealousy. The second, only a millisecond later was extreme excitement. I couldn't believe it. But really... She was one of the last people I thought I'd cross off my "cool list." I really thought I'd have a child before her so this is probably some of the biggest news I've heard in a long time.

She's married. We've hung out together as couples and done things in the past. She and I have talked a little about kids... We both have a lot in common and waiting to have kids is/was a common denominator.

She told me how this came as a surprise to her. She missed a week of birth control, awaiting a new pack. Then went back on, but didn't use another form of BC during the first week back on it. She thought they'd be fine but apparently she's pretty fertile.

I'm so excited for her, and I am also spontaneously turning into an emotional wreck. She told me while I was at work, and an hour or two later it just hit me. It was so bad, I choked up while I was anchoring! No seriously, I was struggling through one of my scripts and had a hard time pulling it together. Luckily I was talking about death and fires so it sort of fit, but I had to get a grip before the cheery Valentines stuff.

I've already taken the roll of being her never-been-pregnant not-even-a-mom advisor. I'm practically planning her baby shower already! I'm really excited for her. She told me she doesn't know anyone her age with kids and I told her she should come to my church ;o) (If you're LDS you know what I mean).

She also said she's really nervous about providing for her child, continuing her career, gaining weight... A lot of things I've mentioned here. And while she told me she wished she had been thinking about the same things I've been thinking of the past year I just sat, listening, and wishing I was in her shoes. Yea, it'll be hard, it'll be a struggle, and you weren't expecting it. But it happened! What are you going to do? All you can do is be happy now!

I think I'm emotional because I'm shocked... I didn't expect it. And because we are SO much alike--Knowing she's having a child now makes me think I could do it. I think I'm jealous because getting pregnant unexpectedly takes so much pressure off. You just have to go with it. I think I'm a little pissed too... No wait, I think that's just the jealousy talking.

What has gotten into me?! Am I actaully saying I want one because she's having one? Seriously? WTF? I think it's more that that but I can't explain it. Can anyone explain this emotion? If I want a freakin' baby I can have a freakin' baby, so why am I jealous someone else, one of my best friends beat me to it?

So I just thought I'd journal about this extreme turn of events that's left me shocked, and feeling a hint of whiplash from my change in desires and decisions.

And seriously, if one more person tells me they're pregnant right now, I think I may punch them something...

Just kidding.

...Sortof. I may just scream and cry in my pillow.

The Things They Don't Tell You...

I like surprises, but only if they're good. If they're bad, I don't like surprises. Lately I've been getting the dish from one of my friends about all of the things they DON'T tell you about pregnancy (or the time soon-there-after).

First off... You're actually pregnant for 10 months? Waaah? 9 months, ok maybe, but 10 months? Forget it.

When you're water breaks, it doesn't come out all in one gush. Apparently it keeps going and going. I'll have to remember to buy a bag of Depends. (And as you can see from my Dream post I've been having nightmares about this one).

Apparently there's a "plug" that comes out about a week before your water breaks. I'm not sure I'm ready to Google that fact yet, I hear it's pretty gross.

You don't just sit in bed the whole time you're in labor. You walk, apparently sometimes even crawl around.

Every time you hear a baby crying... Even on TV, your boobs will leak (or spray).

Breast feeding hurts.

Thrush? Something about it transferring to boobs?... Don't wanna know.

Your feet grow! My feet are already a size 11 so I hope that's not true!

Afterpains... I guess it's pain after pregnancy, and can hurt worse than labor?!!?

The Epidural gives you the shakes.

What else don't I know? Don't worry, I can handle it! If anything, maybe it'll cure me of my baby fever!

The Big News

Not mine... Yours!... Or anyones I guess. Sorry if I got you excited, but really, you should know that's not in my immediate future right now. But I do have a question about it. I've heard you shouldn't tell people until you're about 12 weeks pregnant. Is that because you could miscarry? Is that pretty common? I feel like once I found out I'd like to tell people right away! Well, I'll guess I'll keep it a secret a little while because I imagine that's a special time between husband and wife to ponder about the exciting and life-changing news. But if you couldn't tell I'm not a private person... Not at all, and I imagine I'll want to spill the beans ASAP. How do you bite your tongue?

I think it'll be hard for me not to share my entire experience here on my blog. It has become like a baby... eeer, pre-baby journal to me, so why stop once I see the plus sign? I guess it could be a sort of lull for a few months but I think it'll be hard for me to keep it a secret!! I'll want to be like "so today I took a home pregnancy test and I'M PREGNANT!" ya know? And whatever happens happens, I'll document every experience, good or bad. Hmmm, I don't know. I'll probably change my mind as time goes on but this is what I'm thinking now.

I'm thinking I won't want to tell people I work with for a few months, so the ones that read my blog will have to keep their mouths shut! I'd probably tell family soon after, but I wouldn't want them to get too too excited in case things change. But I think I'd tell you all right away! It'll be too hard for me not to blog about it every second. I'll want to tell all of my friends cause I mean, you're only pregnant for 9 months so why only get the shrieks and giggles for 6 months? But then again it seems like that's almsot like breaking an unspoken rule. Hmmm, I dunno.

When did you tell everyone? Your spouse? Friends? Family? Employer? Blog readers? I'm curious!

The SAHM Pt. 2

Ok I'm changing the beginning of this post because of the last sudden ANONYMOUS comment I got on my last post. I don't like to respond in the comments section because I'm not sure everyone would be able to see it so I'll respond at the top of this post. The following was the anonymous comment (they left another one after but I'm just posting the first one):

"Honestly. I want to give you credit for having the nerve to even post something so ludicrous.
You don't BUY it? Give me a break.
A whole blog to decide if you want a baby or not? You know you aren't going to do it right now. So, just stop talking about it every day before you do decide to do it. Come talk to us when your pregnant and then when you're a working or WAHM or SAHM.
Until then, your opinion of being a SAHM doesn't matter."

Ok first off... Ouch. Really? You're going to come and tell me my opinion doesn't matter on my OWN blog? And who is "us?" Well thanks... But apparently not many others agree with you. I don't think there's anything wrong with trying to plan before hand and actually asking mothers experiencing things I may one day experience how they handle it. I'm completely honest here and I'm sorry if that offends you but in my post I point blank said I welcomed disagreements because "I'M OPEN TO BEING WRONG" so sheesh... don't get offended lady! Obviously you have a little insecurity or something because I'm not saying I know everything, I'm just stating my opinion. Take a chill pill! I also didn't just say I didn't "buy it" I asked what was so hard about it... And if you noticed, several women actually answered the question on "what is the hardest part about it" rather than just bashing me. Plus, you said you agreed with Jacyee... Well guess what? She has 6 KIDS! Four of them are quadruplets... I'm not saying that's not a dang hard job! And I can understand her for being a little ticked about my post ;o)

Oh... and several people in the comments section said they love being stay at home moms and it's not as stressful as some people make it out to be... I really think it comes down to the person... And YES... maybe one day when I have kids my mind will change completely and I'll do a 180 and think "wow... this is a lot harder than I thought, put be back to work" but that's the fun of this blog... it's a "journey" my journal of expression, and if you've read any other posts you'd realize that I change my mind often :o)

Ok... sorry do go off on a tangent people, I just wanted to get that out of the way. Has anyone else dealt with meanies? I see why people moderate their comments now. I never thought I'd want to erase a comment but yeesh! Anyway... Back to the show:

You all have been great in my quest to determine why being a SAHM is so difficult, by leaving responses here. I've baby sat for a woman a few times who is a stay at home mother. She always seems slightly stressed or uptight when I go over to her house. Seeing the way she interacted with her children was always endearing and interesting to me, but seeing what she puts herself through just made me think "I couldn't do it." At least not like that.

I think some of the same women who said things like "if my husband would watch the kids instead of watching TV yea, maybe he could be a stay at home dad" are some of the ones who also maybe, possibly, put too much pressure on themselves at home (but who am I to assume?).

I have however witnessed so many women (especially while I lived in Utah) who felt like their house had to be put together neatly at all times. The kids had to be cleaned up after almost immediately, the rules and regulations in the home were strict, and so were the schedules. It made me want to just grab them by the shoulders and say "it's going to be O.K. calm down!" I imagine if I'm going to do it my husband will have to clean up the mess we all make when he gets home from work... (Hey, whatever keeps me from taking Xanex, ok?) But really, I'm not a neat person anyway, so maybe that's why I feel that way. I can't imagine being my messy self then having a messy bunch of spawn on top of that!

By all means, if cleaning and cooking is what makes you happy go for it, but if being at home with MY children turns out to be extremely stressful, perhaps some rearranging should be done.

My grandmother is in her 50s and she looks AMAZING! I asked her how she hardly has wrinkles and she told me: "I don't stress." And she gave me some advice I don't think I'll ever forget... "If you have a problem you don't like, fix it, and if you can't fix it, get over it. Because stressing is only going to give you wrinkles."

There really are so many women out in the world who would LOVE to be at home with their children but can't afford to. Regardless if it's the world's hardest job or not... If it's a job you got to choose then it's a privilege. It may not pay monetarily but if the rumors are true, you're rewarded in much better ways.

If I ever have the opportunity to be a stay at home mom I hope I can remember this lighthearted advice I'm giving right now... And can really embrace it and make the most of it. I imagine it would be easy to get bored (with one) and go crazy (with several) but I hope that I can keep the cheerful spirit I have now and enjoy that time with my kids (and not eat my words).

I hopefully will at least get three months at home with the first and get a taste of SAHM life... Then I'LL be the one to judge if it's REALLY all that hard ;o) especially compared to a job like I have now, or worse... A job like I have now PLUS being a mom 24/7.

But regardless, I'm sure it's all not peaches and creme, I know it's 24/7, and really... I'm not trying to downplay it. Just trying to get a feel for what it's really like for you, in all honesty.

The Vitamins

A lot of you have been saying vitamins are a good idea to find beforehand. I have a friend who told me she took a prenatal pill every day at the same time she took her birth control. I thought that was one of the strangest things I had ever heard. Why in the world would she DO that? Wouldn't one cancel out the other? Well now that I've been thinking more seriously about turning the BMM on, I thought I'd look up a good time to start taking those things.

Naturally, I thought it's a good idea to do it at the same time I get rid of the birth control, but I came across an article that said it's actually a good idea to start taking some things 2-3 months before you start doing the deed for real. So now I'm looking into what kinds of pills/supplement stuff I may want to get when it comes to being that close in time.

It looks like folic acid, and iron are two things that are a big deal to have. It would be nice to find an all-in-one multivitamin that I could take and not really have to worry about what I'm getting and not getting. I know too many multivitamins can be too much so I'd like to just take one. Hopefully this will be another good habit I can form before it's baby makin' time. Right now I have a hard time taking the calcium pills I need (I don't drink milk)!

I went out the other day just to see what was out there and I found these, 100 tablets for $4. You only have to take 1 a day. It has calcium, folic acid, iron, all that good stuff and more. Hubby was shopping with me and I was a little reluctant to put them in the basket. I tried to be discreet but he caught on.

"Are you trying to hide that or something?" he asked.
"No... But the name on the bottle might freak you out a little."

I guess that was his cue to check it out. I waited for the freak out... It didn't come. He only asked if it would cancel out my birth control... "No"... Eer, I hope not. Just in case I don't think I'll take them for a while.

I'm hoping I can find a different multivitamin that's like pre-prenatal, but I'm not sure they make those.

I'm a little paranoid about the side-effects. I hear some people get insomnia, have a hard time getting them down, get nauseas... I don't need people thinking I'm pregnant yet.

Do you ladies have any recommendations for specific supplements you like? Any particular brand or kind you may want one day? I read it's good for hair, nails, and just all around health.

The Season

Two summers ago I worked a long side a pregnant reporter in Atlanta, Georgia. She was very pregnant... And running around in high heels, I don't know how she did it! She told me to avoid getting pregnant in the summer months... Or being super pregnant in the summer months I should say.

This memory struck me the other day and got me thinking about when the perfect time of year is to have a baby. What are things to consider? Weather? A tax write off? Are boys or girls more prone during a certain time of year? Zodiac signs for sure need to be considered.

I'm a Capricorn myself and some of my best friends are Cappis. Hubby is a Scorpio, they are great but a little shy sometimes and I'm hoping for an outgoing kid so I should probably stay away from a November baby.

The summers are hot in Austin, I'd prefer not to be super hot while I'm the size of a whale already, but I hate the cold too and I really don't want to feel uncomfortable! Plus you can go swimming all summer... But I'm not sure who would want to see my pregnant belly at a pool!

Man, there's so much to consider! Do you know of many superstitions or have opinions on the best time of year to be pregnant/have a baby?

And for my new readers, unbeknown to my sarcasm... I'm kidding (kind of).

Thanks to Mama Bee for this topic idea!!

******

Oh, and the winner of the cute diaper wipes case is Commenter #20... Goldibug! She's been a follower for a while and won my 100th follower contest! Thanks for playing!

I'll be having another big giveaway soon, probably when I reach 200 followers or hit my 200th post... Or whenever I get around to it, whichever comes first :)

Things They Don't Tell You Pt2.

Thanks to The Oprah Show and you as well as a lot of my Twitter friends my list has grown so much I've made a second list of "The Things They Don't Tell You". These things aren't meant to scare me, or any other Future Mamas out there who are thinking of having kids, yet beware... They may. My commentary is in color.

Hemroids- Pregnancy can give them to ya. I wasn't exactly sure what they were but I googled it and ew.

You'll get use to feeling your boob on the side of your stomach... I'm not looking forward to loosing the perkiness :(

Little boys get woodies too-- Saw this one on Oprah... TMI if you ask me.

Lice is hard to get to go away.--I'm not sure I'll have to deal with this one cause I've never had lice and I hear black people don't get it. I hope that's the case for half-black kids too!

I'll hate my husband for knocking me up-- This one I also saw on Oprah, it's believable, but I REALLY hope we can make it an enjoyable experience for all of us.

I may not like my baby right away-- This is a sad one for me. But I guess it's good to know that may happen. But I love everyone elses baby so I can't imagine not liking my own!

A woman on Oprah said she felt like she had made a bad mistake-- Once again, possible, however I'm thinking I'll not let myself feel that way (I try to live life without regret).

Pump, or explode

You loose your choices- This is another complain from a mom on Oprah. I suppose if you go into motherhood expecting things to be easy and the same as before plus having a child on your hip you're going to have a rude awakening. I'm not afraid to make sacrifices and giving up "me time" when the time is right.

Some women say you "loose yourself"-- but I'm assuming that's a problem you run into if you don't already know yourself. I don't think it's "Loosing yourself" but gaining another part of yourself...But I'm not a mom so what do I know?

It's "Freaking’ hard work"- (no commentary needed)

Days where I would hate my kids-- If my kids are anything like some of the kids I see screaming and acting wild out at the store I guess I can believe this, however I don't like to use the work "hate."

You can be constantly constipated while pregnant?! --Waaah?

...And going with that : Milk of magnesia will help you poop (thanks for the tip)

The term "Letdown" is exactly what it says.

Labor stinks... LITERALLY... eew.

Your period is gone for your entire period but then you have it for like a MONTH after the baby is born... Boo!

You can have contractions weeks before you're really in labor... Good to know now so I don't freak out too bad if that happens to me!

And what freaked me out the most and came as the biggest surprise to me: In labor doctors have to cut that piece of skin between where the baby is coming out and your butt hole to keep it from tearing.... OUCH!

***

And I'm always excited to learn more, so let me know if I've left anything out! Anything you wish you had known before getting pregnant/ becoming a parent?

The Physicals

I set up appointments to get physicals more than a month ago. I'm not a huge fan of doctor's offices and I consider myself very lucky to have a nurse for a mother-in-law. I usually call her with all of my medical questions, and to make sure I'm not dying.

As a part of this list of things to do 6 months to a year before baby makin' I decided to go ahead and at least do this.

We arrived to our appointments right on time... Not 20-minutes early like the receptionist asked. I liked the way the office building looked. It was small, quaint. Unlike the huge and commercialized offices I had visited previously.

After completing our paperwork the nurse quickly called me back. I motioned for my husband to follow me back but he shook his head. "You can come," I urged just above a whisper. But he wouldn't.

After doing a series of basic blood pressure and pulse tests she instructed me to change into the clinic scrubs. When she left the room I heard her call my husband in and apologize that she didn't ask us to come in together 'yea, that's what I tried to tell him' I thought.

So there we were. Our doctor, and Indian man, was probably the nicest doctor we've ever had. In fact, normally we don't like to go to the people in white coats, but he changed our perception. But what threw me for a loop was when the doctor asked: "So are you two thinking about starting a family?" and after glancing at my husband, I let him reply, he said: "Yea, probably in the next 1 to 2 years." I gave him the 'what?!--No, wait, we'll talk later' look, and as soon as the doctor left the room we did.

"A year to two years?" I asked.
"I didn't mean to say that," he said defensively. "I meant I wanted to have a kid in hand in like a year or two."
"Well no one thinks in those terms," I shot back.

While I went to get blood work done hubs completed his physical, and when I walked in I overheard them completing a conversation about what's safe before or during pregnancy. 'Now we're talking,' I thought.

We decided to take our Tetanus/ Pertussis shots then as to not have to worry about it later when it's baby makin' time. The doctor gave me good advice... Prenatals, calcium pills, constant exercise, yoga and meditation (?), OB referrals... The whole nine yards. I felt a lot better after going through that process-- Actually talking to a professional and getting my questions out in the open.

I got a phone call the other day about our blood test results. My husband's came in a day before mine and I worried something was wrong--What if I was.. you know. Do they test for that?

The woman on the other end of the line with my results paused before she read my results. Blood sugar--Good. Iron levels--Good. Cholesterol level--Good, and she paused before she read my last result... I was at 106 for my "bad cholesterol" level, the doctor likes me to stay around 100. Diet and exercise better and get checked again in 6-12 months if I'm not pregnant.

I let out a sigh of relief, not because I needed an excuse to lay off the french fries, but because she didn't tell me the news I've been dreading--I've been suspicious about. I have a feeling this is only the beginning of my paranoia.

The Push Present

Have you heard about these? I hadn't, but now that I know about it you'd better believe I'm signing up for this trick.

We were talking about our wedding rings at work when one of my friend's said one of her friends got a brand new diamond ring as a "push present." 'WT eff is that?' was my thought, so I asked. And like it sounds, it's a present expected from the expectant father. A thank-you gift your husband will give to you while "pushing" through labor... A motivational gift I guess you can say, and it's given to a new mother either before, during or right after delivering her new baby. Sounds sweet right?

Apparently this has been going on for a long time. In England it's tradition for men to give their wives a diamond ring. In India they give their new mothers gold jewelry. I guess here in the US it's just starting to pick up and it's most spreading by word of mouth. So ladies are you with me? To all of my pregnant friends: Get your husbands to do this for you and by the time I have a child I'll have enough evidence to convince mine to do the same. Have any of you heard of this before? Or practiced this brilliant custom?

You'd best believe I already told my husband about this. He may not think I'm serious about this right now but I'm expecting one of these when I have a baby. No, I'm not pregnant yet, so I have a while to convince him, decide what I want and save for it.

I'm not positive yet, but I'm thinking something like this would be just right:

(actual size)

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And the winners of my Easter Weekend (and beyond) Giveaway are (drum roll please):

Original Digital Baby Announcement: #73 Tammy from One Step at a Time: She won with her second comment that said she's now following but she said she's about to be a first time grandma and her son and daughter in law! Congrats!

No-Slip Grip MacyMay Clippies from La Bébé Boutique: #57 Babalisme with her self-titled blog Babalisme. Her favorite clippies were the Miss Pretty style.

Email me so I can get you your prizes! And if you didn't win don't worry I still have an adorable cloth diaper giveaway from DiaperKits.com.

If you're interested in sponsoring a giveaway you can email me at babymakingmachine{at}gmail{dot}com

The Oldest

I always thought I wanted a girl first, because... Well, because they're cute and I really just want to get the girl out of the way! Plus, I've really got a system down with these cute baby hairbows I make and as one of hubby's aunt's says "Now you're gotta make a baby to put in them!" SO TRUE!... But it would have to be a girl, or else that would just be weird.

So I have it all planned out to have a girl right? You probably saw my rituals post about things I'm going to do to have a girl. Well, I may be changing my mind. See...Boyz II Men came to town and were playing all of their old school love songs. I missed the concert but my news station covered it. It got us all pulling up the songs on Youtube and singing along... Well when we got to this one song called "A Song for Mama" I got all teary eyed and decided I want a boy (love how I just decide what I'm going to have, like I have a choice in the matter?).

So it got me thinking about the months we'll have to do it to have a boy and the stuff I'll have to eat.. positions, etc. Plus, hubby wants a boy (go figures right?) and I wouldn't mind having a momma's boy.

So I was all set to have a boy...but then I got to thinking... The oldest child, would I rather it be a boy or girl? Hubby and I are both the oldest and I get a lot with my siblings a lot better than he does... He gets a long with them, it's just that he doesn't COMMUNICATE with them at all often. I Tweeted the question "what do you think is better for a first child, boy or girl?" and most peopel said girl... For the same reasons. So now I think I'm back to square one.

Obviously I'll be happy with either. I've come a long way... I'm pretty much torn 55/45 (girl)right now with what I'd like, but when we first got married I was worried I wouldn't like my son if he came out first... Harsh right? I don't feel that way anymore. I'll be happy with a healthy baby but I'm going to "experiment" for a girl... I have a 50% chance (actually I think it's 49%) naturally, but I'll see if I can beat the odds.

Sharon asked me if I had a gut feeling what I'd have one way or the other... Here's what I think (as of now pre-conception) I think it's going to be a BOY!! Why? Because it would be ironic and my life is ironic. Oh, and because I've been having lots of dreams about a baby boy lately... I think he's ready to come down. I use to dream about a girl all the time... What do you think happneed to her? Hmm... We'll see!

The Crying Baby

It's such a simple sound that appears to strike up a different emotions in each woman in the chapel.

An anxious look crosses the face of a new mother--She rushes to hush her baby, afraid to disturb others, or over-frustrate her child.

There's the tenured mom, who keeps smiling as she listens to the speaker--As if she hears no other sound. Has she learned to tune it out?

Just an isle in front of me there's the expectant mother, pregnant with her first child. She smiles in awe at the piercing sound--The look on her face says she's listening to a beautiful song.

There's the married woman, not yet pregnant and not yet trying who forces a smile on her face, perhaps covering up slight annoyance as she watches the anxious mother leave the room with her wailing baby. She sits, watches and smiles--Probably thinking 'I'm so glad that's not me,' or wondering how soon she'll be on that end of the spectrum, and how she'll be different.

Then there's me, somewhat indifferent, studying the room of women and their response to the crying baby. I feel like I connect with each of the women on different levels. Compassion. Respect. Envy. Understanding.

One day I'll have experienced every vantage point. Witnessed the beauty from every angle. But for today, I'm enjoying the view from my window.

No matter you're style: crunchy, chewy, soggy, cloth/disposable, boob/bottle, Current Mommy/Future Mommy, you are an amazing woman and have great worth!

Happy Mother's Day!

The Way to Break the News

NO I'm not pregnant, I'm just getting prepared for that day which may come soon or one day far far from now I have no clue! Hey, that's what this blog is all about!

I know I threw out the topic before in this post of sharing baby makin' time (or TTC for some of you). It seemed like a lot of you didn't. I don't think I will either... It takes away the surprise you know? (But still... No, I'm not). But when the deed is done and you're with-spawn, when did you share the news?

I hear 3 months is the general guideline, just in case there's a loss. I can understand that, but at the same time that's 3 months excitement out the door!

I guess it depends how open I am to disclosing the ups and downs of my pregnancy. I know people who told everyone (announcing on Facebook) the moment they found out!! I think I'll be somewhere in between. I want to keep it secret for as long as I can so we'd have time to soak it in. Then leak the news to parents and best friends, then maybe once I begin to get phat (yes I spelled it that way on purpose) I'll tell people I work with. Oh, and I don't think I'll be able to help but leak the news here on my blog right away either--Well, after family is informed... It's my diary for goodness sakes, I can't help it if people read it! (If you work with me you'll be sworn to secrecy) Hmm, what would you do if you were me? And what did you do?

Ok and next important matter to discuss... HOW to tell. I've always thought it would be cute to think of a cute way to tell my husband and our parents but I know if I don't think of it WAY in advance I'll just blurt it out... Which is ok too but I think it would be fun to do something cute.

I'm not sure if he'll be the type to count down to the test date and want to know right away... I imagine he'll forget and I'll be the one alone with my count downs and tests, which is a better set up for a surprise. And what better way to share such exciting news than with a surprise?!

I've heard a few cute things like setting little shoes next to his shoes on the side of the bed. Leaving the test out for him to find. Michelle wrote a whole post with cute ideas!

I already know how I want to tell our parents! I'm not sure if they read my blog... Pretty sure they don't for the most part so I'll share ok?(and if you are reading don't peek!)-- I want to have a normal phone conversation with them, then when we're hanging up say "bye grandma" and hang up, and see how long it takes for them to call back. I dunno, it's an idea I heard of awhile ago and I thought it would be cute.

But other than that I have no idea where to start for ideas, and I'm kind of scared to even research any right now cause I may get too giddy and I don't need giddy right now... I need serious, level headed! So help me out! What did you do? Or what do you plan to do? What's the cutest idea you've heard?! Let's stock up!!

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And the winner of the Cloth Diaper Giveaway brought to you by DiaperKits.com is Lucky number Carrie of Make it Count! Woohoo! Get me your information!

I also have not one or two but THREE more giveaways coming up! So stay tuned!! And if you have something you're interested in sponsoring here for a giveaway email me at babymakingmachine@gmail.com

The Perfect Age Pt. 1 (RE-POST)

I'm still debating... And thinking a lot. I've got a lot of big, ginormous, questions and ideas on children swimming around in my head, but I'm amidst sorting them out right now and I'm not allowed to post them all (I'm sort of on censorship probation right now with you-know-who). All of these things have put me in a sort-of blogging lull, and I've decided to go on strike.

Just kidding... Kind of.

I'm doing my first ever re-post... Of something I wrote a few weeks after starting my blog. It's for those who are new (which is like all of you cause only like 2 people read my blog back then-- I was one of them). I was, as I am still now, debating a lot about "timing" and "age." Here is my original post, and below the second set of stars is my updated thoughts from today, 5 months later.

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Ok ok, obviously the time is different for everyone and from what I've hear you're never really "ready," but for the sake of my blog, humor me a little while I compare and contrast.

As of now I'm thinking I'll be in my 20s when I have my first child, but that has fluctuated over my four years of marriage. I have no intentions of being in my 40s but early 30s could be a possibility. Here are some interesting tidbits I learned from a very long article.

20s

-"Physically, the 20s are the ideal time for pregnancy," doctors say. Because your body is primed to handle the demands of carrying a baby.
-You're less likely to have pregnancy complications or babies with Down Syndrome.
-You can also grow up with your child (I'm personally not a fan of that idea, I can't imagine having a teenager before I'm 40... SCARY!!!
-Mentally: A lot of my (non-LDS) friends won't have kids yet, and I may have to put my career/advanced education on hold for awhile.
-Also, still relatively new in a marriage, we'd have to make sure we plan more time for each other.

Stories:

Carla (was 21)-The down side: Being a young mom means that it's hard not to be selfish about my time. I used to sleep in, read, or watch TV whenever I wanted and go out with friends any night I pleased. All these freedoms go away when you're a parent.

The good side: Bouncing back after pregnancies is easier when you're younger. I've gotten down to my starting weight after each one. Two weeks after I had Aliza I was in a bridesmaid dress.

I'm happy that my kids have young grandparents -- they're all in their 50s -- and seven great-grandparents. I'm always calling my mom and mother-in-law for advice

Samantha (was 25)- My career had been important to me -- I was just starting out and was very ambitious. But during my maternity leave, I realized that motherhood was what life was about for me right now.

My friends hadn't had kids yet. Some of my closest mom friends are women in their 30s and 40s whom I met in the neighborhood or at playgroups. They were eager to take me under their wing and share their wisdom.

There are times when Chris and I hear about all the wild things our single friends are doing and we're envious. But then something magical happens at home with our boys and we're reminded that we have such a full life to be thankful for.

30s

-At higher risk of developing certain complications. But the majority of healthy women still have uneventful pregnancies at this age. At age 35 there's 1/200 chance of having a child with Down Syndrome.
-More likely to have a C-section
-Mentally: I've had time for myself and my marriage, and I've accomplished some professional goals. This could give peace of mind if wanting to take a break to spend time with spawn.
-It'll be easier to find a support group of pregnant friends and get advice.

Stories:

Carol (was 30)- Good side: Financial stability -- we own our own apartment now, and we've got some money saved for Emily's education. It also meant that Emily doesn't have to compete with my career. I put so much time and energy into my job in my 20s that I felt like I was able to step back a little once I had her. I found a new position within the company that allows me to work at home sometimes, so I can spend more time with her.

Because we waited to have kids, our parents are all retired or about to retire, which means I get a lot of help! My parents-in-law watch Emily every day while I'm at work.

(apparently she had no down sides)

Erica (was 36)- I'm glad that I had time to be spontaneous, go out with friends, and travel before having kids -- it's a lot harder to get out of the house and do things when you have a baby. And I feel like I'm a better person for having had the experiences I did before having Lena. I just hope that she'll feel the same way and that she'll keep me young.

40s

-Having a baby in your 40s is common these days, and the majority of older mothers have totally normal pregnancies. Still, the risk of complications rises after age 40.
-This is crazy: If you're physically fit, eat well, and don't have preexisting health conditions such as diabetes or hypertension, your overall risk of other pregnancy complications isn't markedly higher than that of a woman in her 20s or 30s.
-The self-confidence and perspective you've picked up in your life may make you more patient in dealing with a demanding newborn.

Story:

Andrea (was 44)-Down sides: My friends' children are now in college, so I'm completely out of sync! They went through all the sleepless nights and playdates and pediatrician appointments years ago -- and I'm just starting. I honestly don't feel my age at all, but I realize that as I get older it's going to become more challenging.

I thought being older would mean that I'd be more prepared for motherhood. I was centered, had traveled extensively, had eaten in all the best restaurants, and had bought all the clothes I wanted. But honestly, the experience of the two of them brings me to my knees. I wouldn't have been more prepared at 144.

As of now I'm saying the perfect age is..... (Drumroll please)...... 30!! Not in 30s but 30. That'll give me another 7 years to get where I want to be in my career, hopefully have a Master's Degree, and I'll have been married for *gasp* 12 years!! -Do I think that'll happen? No, but as of today,that's my story and I'm sticking to it. (Ask me again tomorrow).

I'd love to hear your stories!! I'd love to see personal examples from people in 20s 30s and 40s! (Or opinions of why you'd prefer one over another).

-Also, if you'd like to read more about pregnancy in each age group here's a few more articles.

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Well, I'm not thinking 30 is my lucky age anymore... No, at this point I'll be happy if I make it to 25. Today I've got the baby itch more than ever. I may not be rich, or have the Lexus I always wanted (for awhile), but something's telling me I'll still be able to accomplish the things I want to... Maybe even more so with a little one.

I don't think it'll be easy, but I think it'll be possible. And I think that's what I want. Motherhood won't take the ambition out of me... Like I always imagined it would, I think that's in my blood, and no magic number, small or large will change me.

Did you like the age you were when you became a mother? Future Mamas... What age are you currently in love with?

The Godmother

Fourth-grade was one of my favorite years of elementary school. Not because I had the coolest teachers or because I made straight-A's but because that's the year I made a best friend.

I remember it like it was yesterday, our classes were combined and we were making totem polls with animals on them to describe what kind of person we were. I noticed the girl working on her project next to me had a rabbit on hers... 'What a strange animal to choose,' I thought. I asked her why she put a rabbit on hers and she told me because she was as swift as a rabbit.

"I bet I'm faster than you," I challenged, and she accepted--Today, at recess, we'd race.

We went to the long, open end of the playground with lots of running room. We had an audience nearby watching, cheering us on, and keeping us fair. I didn't have a doubt in my mind that I'd win.

"On your mark. Get set. GO!"

We both took off running but didn't get far before we heard a strange noise. A fart? I can't remember, but we both laughed the whole way down the field. Can't remember who won but it didn't matter. That moment is what started our unbreakable friendship.

The rest is history.

When 5th grade rolled around her mom switched her into my class. We had our ups and downs as any friends do, but Shannon has been my most loyal friend my entire life. She stuck up for me when people made fun of me--Called me anorexic. Told them I ate like a pig and just don't gain a think--"You should be jealous" she's tell them.

In junior high we both were cut during Dance Team tryouts, and we were sad together. She stood by my side as I was rejected by several boys. And we folded and passed notes like no other.

In high school, my moving to a new neighborhood and new school didn't keep us from being best friends. We went to each other's homecoming dances, and we kept each other in check when we veered from the straight and narrow. We went to different churches, but shared the same devotion to our Lord and Savior.

Then the big move came... My family moved across the country to Arizona, where I completed my last semester of high school. We didn't see each other for 5 years, though we called, and wrote often... And every time we talked it was like we hadn't skipped a beat.

We finally saw each other again in college. She flew out to Utah to visit me at BYU. I had just started dating my husband and it was already serious... He was moving in a few weeks so I was torn with spending quality time with her as well as him. Looking back I should have enjoyed that time with her because I have the rest of my life to spend with him!--Unfortunately I didn't know nor understand that at the time.

We didn't see each other again for three years after that. Then I moved to Atlanta for a summer job and internship, and while we were both busy, we made sure to spend as much time together as possible... This time I was married but away from my husband and SHE had the serious boyfriend. It's funny how easy it is to see how it feels once you're on the other side of the fence--For both of us.

I flew out to Atlanta again a year after my stint living there for her wedding and we haven't gotten together since. Of course we talk all the time... Possibly more than ever now, as we're both married, and going through similar questions and challenges.

We told each other we'd wait to have children the same time so we could also go through that experience together.--You know, remember this post? As I started thinking more and more about becoming a mom and my urge grew stronger as the years of my marriage went by, I began to think she'd have to catch up on my second kid... So you can imagine my surprise when last month she told me she was pregnant. Now she's trying to get ME to catch up to her! Oh how the tables have turned. At first I took it hard, but now I am more happy for her than ever. I'm already trying to figure out when I'll be able to plan my trip down there, plan a baby shower and spoil the mom-to-be and baby!

Yesterday when we were talking on the phone I just couldn't wrap the idea around it--Her being a MOM. I can totally picture it, it's just so hard to believe that we're here already. Her--A mom to me, and me, contemplating being a mom-to-be. It seems like just yesterday we were chanting "Goin' to the chapel and we're gonna get married WITH TRISTAN!"... Our 5th grade crush. I feel like her becoming a mom is kind of like me becoming a mom--Or being forced to grow up just a little bit more as my best friend--My sister embarks on this journey. Yesterday, when I was talking about being an "auntie" she corrected me and said "Godmother!"

After Googling the term to make sure I knew exactly what my duties entailed, it seems as though nowadays it's more of an honorary term. I'll be like the extra-mommy there to spoil forever! I'm so excited and so honored! She'll of course be the Godmother of my children as well, and I just can't wait until we both have our little kids and can live near each other and have our kids grow up together! Hopefully I won't be too far behind...

Are you a Godparent? What are your duties? Do your children have Godparents?

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I'm coming up on my 6-month Blogaversary (I know, so what, but I like reasons to celebrate, ok?) so I figured I'll do a little Q and A. Feel free to ask me any question your heart desires (favorite food, color, whatever!) and I'll answer them on Friday May 29th for my Half-Blogaversary! You can ask in the comments or email them to babymaking machine (at) gmail.com.

The BIG Ooops!

This morning, I woke up kind of wondering why I haven't been having my normal monthly signs that I normally do a day or so before she shows up. Well, I got a little curious and decided to bust out one of my dollar store pregnancy tests and pee on it... You know, just for fun (Yea, I do that from time to time).

I was a little sad I was about to break my streak. I've gone YEARS without pregnancy paranoia and I was about to ruin it!

When I opened the box all of this stuff fell out... a small test, a packet of some stuff to keep it fresh, and a droplet thing that I was apparently suppose to use but didn't. I didn't have time to pee in a cup then dip the droplet thing then drip a little in the little hole... So I just peed straight on the stick, trying to get a good amount in the hole.

As I watched the ENTIRE screen turn pink I wondered if I 1. was WAY pregnant or 2. put WAY too much pee in the hole. I think it was the latter.

After a few moments I saw the line I was waiting for cross the screen and display one...tw?.. No one line, and exactly what I wanted to see. I put all of the contents back in the box and hit it under a few things in the trashcan. No need to freak hubby out... Yet.

I went on through my normal day, at work. Come afternoon, I was talking to one of my best friends on the phone. We were talking about our paranoia for illness and I was explaining my hypochondriac-self, and how I had taken a pregnancy test in the morning and quickly threw it away. That's when she brought a good point to light.

"Well did you wait three minutes?" She asked me. "You're suppose to wait three minutes... Go brush your teeth or something while you're waiting, then go back to look at it."

I'm pretty sure I only waited about 30 seconds before seeing one line and throwing it away.

When I was done with work I rushed home and up the stairs to the trashcan and dumped the contents of the box out on the counter (eew I know, but don't worry I cleaned it up!)

The test looked different than it did earlier that morning. That can't be two lines... No. I'm hallucinating. One line was dark, the other very faint, but not exactly over the little letter that it should be over to signify pregnancy. Wait.. Was there a third line? What does that mean? Or is there just a second one in a different spot? My eyes are playing tricks on me. I broke the test! No, I don't want to take another one, then I'll really be crazy! And I can't take it to my husband to examine cause... Well that could just be ugly. I'm pretty sure I either left it there too long or I peed on it too much, cause I know I'm not pregnant.

Now I'm tiptoeing around. Waiting for my visitor, aka "witch" to some but for now "goddess" to me, to show up for her appointment. If she's not here waiting for me tomorrow morning I just. may. freak. !

I must add though that since this morning I'm starting to feel my usual symptoms I feel about this time so I'm sure I'll feel worse/better tomorrow and that I didn't just announce my pregnancy to the world-wide-web before I did to my husband/ myself.

PS: Today is still my half-blogiversary, celebrate with me on the post below!